I just don’t want to hear it..
These are the words that about once a week leave my mouth. It is always when I am tired or moody or bitchy or stressed or hormonal. It is typically the day that Max is just so tired or moody himself and he cries and cries and cries. Each minute I watch my patience lessen and I can feel my shoulders and neck tighten with each cry and each whine. And then I just can’t do it any longer and I say, “I just don’t want to hear it.” It pains me to hear myself say this but I just can’t help it. I have tried to give myself a time out and walk away but after a minute I need to come back and take care of the crying kid.
I don’t think I am a bad mom. I know that all moms go through this and some more than others but it just hurts. I know part of being a mom is that I show my children that I am human and not perfect and that I have bad days too but I worry about hurting his self esteem. But somedays I just don’t have it in me.
Yesterday was one of those days. The day prior I drove Max back to Philly for his speech and so we were in the car for about 5 hours in a 7 hours period. Then I came home and went running with my husband at 3 pm and ran 3 miles. Then I woke up yesterday and took the kids for a 5 mile run. What was I thinking. Did I mention that it was horribly windy out and I must have been crazy? So I had nothing left and Max was not happy at all. I also told him that he should go to him room so he could have privacy and cry since I did not want to hear it.
Like I said, I know I am not a bad mom but it still sucks when I have days like this. And yes my new obsession is running. I am running about 3 miles 5 or 6 days a week and just yesterday ran 5 miles with a double stroller, which is pushing about 80 pounds (the stroller and the weight of the kids). I am interested to see what I can do without the stroller.
I wish I cold put myself in time out sometimes. 
LOL
I know exactly what you mean. When I am at my end I yell “Enough”, and I really hate that. I need a time out too
I read all of your sons allergies. That’s quite a list!! I thought we had it bad with wheat, rye, barley, oat, egg, peanut and tree nut. Thanks for stopping by today!
Hmmmm…I don’t have a specific phrase I yell when I am angry. I just start yelling about everything “WHY DID YOU HIT HER?!?” “GO TO TIME OUT!!!” “NO WHINING!” Its the whining and crying that break me down. I can only handle it for so long, and then I start coming apart at the seams.
I need a time out too! And I say all of the time, “I don’t want to hear it.” It’s a normal mom thing- don’t be so hard on yourself, we’re only human!
well … I enforce a no crying in the middle of the living room rule. When anyone (including myself b/c it does happen) loses their emotional control and cannot regain it (obviously not due to injury and the like) we are all to head to our room till we have our happy faces on again and are ready to talk it over. For Becca who is very used to this, most times she doesn’t make it to her room. She starts walking away crying then turns her emotions around and comes back to talk. Ethan it takes me helping him to his room. It is not a punishment and they are free to leave once they are not yelling/crying. I too will go to my room if I am not in a good space at the time. This drives my children absolutely crazy and they hate it, but yeesh sometimes I Have to go or I will be rotten!
ps … how does one test for allergies? I am starting to get a little concerned about Ethan’s eating. Thanks girl.
Wow! I think pushing an 80 lb stroller in the wind is pretty amazing! I don’t know that I could WALK, much less RUN, while pushing anything like that! You rock!
As for the crying/whining, etc. I agree with chelle’s idea. You go to your room to get your crying out, think about whatever you need to think about, and pull yourself together before you come out. I think that’s a good idea to at least try. But make sure Max knows its not for punishment too.
Of course you aren’t a bad mom! You are wonderful!
As long as you can remember that it’s OK to have those days and to lose it and to say things … and then come back and tell Max that you love him and that you have hard days too… that is what really matters. Communicate to him how you feel. He may not get it today, but the more you talk the more he will… and think about the man he will be when he grows up knowing what it’s like to be a real person with feelings
i often need mommy time outs