A word about letting go
When I found myself almost in tears the other day, I had to ask myself what was going on with me. I know when I a holding on and when I am easily letting go. I also know when the BITCH arrives inside of me that sometimes it is hormones and sometimes I am holding onto to something that I need to let out. Sunday I must have yelled NO so many times. I hate being that way. I am really good at keeping my shit under control but sometimes I am at the end of my rope. Sunday Max did not nap, which tends to sometimes happen if he is really teething, and so it happened this day.
Philadelphia is now in the World Series and my husband has tickets to he Phillies as well as the Eagles. So this past week has been rough for me with him being out late at night with friends. He also went out the other night to give him friend a welcome home party. I am usually fine with him going out when it is twice a week with friends or business partners. I enjoy time to myself but I also need a husband and a father here too. I dont need to hang out with him every night because there are many times I just want to be alone to unwind but lately I just feel more needy and I hate that too.
These nights the hubby came home real late and the details are not important but what is- is that I stood up for what I need for my family.
So I think between the world series games and the Eagles I was just feeling alone and pregnant. I think also because I am bigger and not feeling like I can ever get comfortable to snuggle, I tend not to. I think I was just feeling like I need a little extra attention. I let the hubby know how I felt. I love that he had buddies that he hangs with but I also need him to be here with us. Hubby understood. This has happened before and I think for us-well we have bi-weekly reminder conversations and sometimes I have one big one a month. That is what works for us. I am lucky that when we do the hubby listens. We have both worked hard to get to that place instead of feeling defensive or just plain mean.
Thank goodness for letting go because the tears flowed, we hugged and I slept last night so well. FYI- we also sat in bed watching the game together. What a great night.
I love hearing about how you and your DH work on your relationship. It’s beautiful how much the two of you care about each other and how hard you work to get past the little things that don’t come naturally.
You two are very much in love, aren’t you?
My hubby and I are the same way. Sometimes you just have to stand up for what you need and want for your family, like you said. Good for you.
i love that we do have hubbies that listen – we are lucky girls
and sometimes it just feels good to cry!
Sometimes a good talk will make everything feel better. I am still kind of pissed about John and our KY trip. I probably need to talk about it, instead of walking around angry all day.
It is good to be able to identify the things that are bothering you and then try to talk it out and hopefully thatt helps. I wish I did that more often.
Take care, Rachel – see you soon – Kellan
Talking is so key to everything! Yay for you to talk and for him to listen!!!! I am like you I like my time alone!
Good for you for not holding back!
Way to go, Phillies!