Max at the water rides in our backyard

Originally uploaded by Maxsmom

This was our day two days ago when it was 100 degrees.

Yes my hubby’s b day is today and tomorrow we are having a party with tons of kids and friends and food. And yes, I am nervous as usual because I just start to get such anxiety around these types of events. So I ate and ate and ate and ate and kept eating but that did not work. UGH and ARF.

As usual, I have nothing to worry about and it will be so much fun but I still worry. What do I worry about? Anything and everything?
The whys, the shoulds, the coulds and to top it off, we did not sleep again. I know it was my fault because I had some chocolate (UGH STRESS) and then nursed the little one and well, he did not really go into to REM until 3 am. It was bad and I just wanted to cry but I made the best of it. After rocking him and realizing that it was not working, I brought him downstairs, made some chamomile tea-gave him a few droppers full and then sat and watched Big Brother after Dark on Showtime.

So it was not horrible but today I feel like i am on the verge of a mental breakdown-I actually shed a few tears this morning. I just feel empty.

Hopefully, tonight will be better because I just need good rest and then I am all better.